7 Things I’m Doing Differently to Protect My Mental Health as a Women’s Therapist in My Third Postpartum Journey
My first two postpartum experiences were dark times for me. I likely had undiagnosed PPD and PPA, but I was scared to seek help and lied on the postpartum screening assessment at my six-week appointments to hide how I was feeling. (So many women do this.) This time, it is my goal to protect my mental health and truly thrive.
1. I’m eating gluten and dairy.
With my first two babies, I immediately cut out several major food groups to “proactively” reduce reflux and colic. This mindset—that my diet was likely the biggest problem—created a lot of guilt and anxiety around eating while nursing. I remember being afraid to eat because I thought it would hurt my baby, yet I was so hungry that I felt panicked staring into the fridge, unsure what was safe. This time, I’m protecting myself from that pressure by taking a wait-and-see approach and exploring other possible solutions before eliminating foods.
2. I’m getting out of the house every day.
After the prescribed week in bed, I’ve been intentionally getting outside daily—or going on outings if it’s too cold or rainy. Seeing sunshine, people-watching, and getting a little movement completely changes my mood. It helps me remember what daytime feels like while operating on a 24/7 schedule.
3. I’m using a pacifier and letting others comfort my baby instead of being the pacifier 24/7.
This one is tough for me. I worry about palate development, healthy attachment, and all the reasons the internet says I shouldn’t use a pacifier or bottle—or let him cry for me at three weeks old. But I can feel the difference between my mind slipping into a dark place and feeling calm and capable when I let his daddy comfort him for a bit so I can focus on my own needs.
4. I’m continuing to take my prenatal vitamins, with the addition of a nursing-safe, mood-boosting herbal supplement.
With my first two, I was so sick of paying for and taking vitamins that I stopped immediately after giving birth. This time, I’m taking nutrient depletion seriously and continuing to supplement my diet while nursing around the clock and physically recovering from pregnancy and labor.
5. I’m being honest about how I’m feeling.
If I’m feeling sad, I tell my partner and friends so they can support me in the moment and help monitor whether I might need professional help. So far, I’ve had many great moments—and other days when the stress catches up to me. On those days, I need help seeing a brighter perspective and caring for myself instead of spiraling.
6. I’m intentionally focusing my parenting energy on maintaining “big-ticket” times and routines with my girls.
When my second baby was born, I tried to be and do everything for my firstborn daughter—including baking a birthday cake at 2 a.m. with a one-week-old baby. Ultimately, I felt like I was failing at everything and was constantly weighed down by mom guilt and missed opportunities for connection.
This time, I’m focused on being available and present for the morning school rush, the after-school snack and homework routine, and bedtime. Being intentional about these three times of day helps me stay consistent and connected with my daughters during the wild first weeks with a newborn, while giving myself permission to let other things go. I still feel big emotions around the pressure to be a perfect mom, but focusing my energy helps me navigate those feelings more successfully.
7. I have additional support resources ready to go.
With my first two, support groups, counseling, and additional therapies felt like vague ideas meant for mothers who were “really struggling.” As a result, I floundered alone for years unnecessarily. This time, I’ve already established care with an acupuncturist and chiropractor who specialize in pregnancy and postpartum health. I attended local postpartum support group sessions while pregnant to get plugged in, so attending postpartum feels less intimidating. I also have a list of perinatal therapists and women’s health physical therapists ready to consult if needed.
Overall
Overall, this third postpartum journey looks different. I’m caring for my mental health by establishing a healthy daily routine, accepting help and support from my partner and friends, and lining up professional resources as added protection. Being honest with myself and others about my susceptibility to postpartum struggles—and proactively creating a prevention plan—has led to a dramatically more positive experience than my previous postpartum journeys.
Disclaimer
Disclaimer: This post reflects my personal postpartum experience and is shared for informational and supportive purposes only. It is not intended to replace individualized medical, mental health, or nutritional advice. Every postpartum journey is unique—please consult your healthcare provider or a qualified mental health professional for guidance specific to your needs.
